CONFIRMED SESSIONS AND SCHEDULE AT LOSING CONTROL 2019

Birmingham, Tuesday 5th February 9:30 - 17.30, Wednesday 6th February 08.30 -15.45

Day 1, Arrival, breakfast, welcome and opening plenary: 9.30am - 11.30am

Day 1, Session 1: 11.30am to 1.00pm

Stella Duffy & Emmie Kell
 Fun Palaces & Cornwall Museums Partnership

You say losing control, we say letting go

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Relationships

Fun Palaces started off as a small idea for a one-off celebration of community-led culture in 2014. Then it changed. To date there have been 1367 Fun Palaces made by approximately 24,000 local people with 340,000 hands-on participants in 15 nations. Learn how a tiny team of three part-time people who spend the majority of their time saying ‘yes’ to total strangers, let go from the beginning to spark a national movement for community at the heart of culture and culture at the heart of community, led by, for and with local people. Stella will be joined by Emmie Kell from Cornwall Museums Partnership, a partner organisation for Fun Palaces’ community Ambassadors Programme.

Getting agreement to get things done - decision-making in action

Type: Teach me
Theme: Power

Description: To collaborate means taking action. But how do we make decisions on what to do, decisions that everyone can really get behind and support? I will introduce the method of ‘consent’ – as used in Sociocracy and Holacracy amongst others. We’ll practice the steps, and also explore the emotional conditions for making this work in real-life situations.

Elena Bagnera & Adrian Brown
Centre for Public Impact

Losing Control in Government: Can Whitehall learn to let go?

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Collaboration

Description: The tools and language of “delivery” have dominated public service reform for years. At the Centre for Public Impact we’ve been exploring how an alternative approach focused on enablement is now emerging. Join us in this interactive session to explore some of the main themes from this movement and share your thoughts about how Whitehall can adopt a more enabling mindset. There may be prizes.

Sam Kinch, Jess Steele & Dan O’Connor
Hearts of Hastings Community Land Trust

Putting power and resources in the hands of the economically excluded: Hastings needs you!

Type: Help me
Theme: Collaboration

Description: In Hastings we have taken inspiration from the UK and around the world and spent the last two years putting place the tools to enable us to run a series of intense, month-long practical exercises led entirely by self-organised teams of the so-called economically excluded. These exercises are not theoretical training programmes –people will be building their own homes and enterprises together, supported by a community of mentors and facilitators. We are close, but practical challenges remain making this work at scale in a UK context. We’d welcome anyone who would like help us grapple with these challenges, or better still join our network and be a part of the learning and growing process over the next 12 months and beyond.

Katie Lee-Hall, Caroline Smith & Jessica Mansel

MS Society

Cracking Co-Production

Type: Teach me
Theme: Collaboration

Description: The MS Society empowers people with lived experience to shape campaigns, policy development and service delivery – through experts by experiences steering groups, to more informal networks, guided by a commitment to inclusivity and diversity. They’ll be sharing best practice examples (including practical tools, techniques and their vision for getting this right), as well as the challenges they’ve faced.

Leslie Brissett

Tavistock Institute of Human Relations

An Organisation for Promoting Understanding of Society

Losing control? You were never in control!

Type: Teach me
Theme: Power

Description: This workshop is for anyone interested in understanding power dynamics in groups, organisations and networks. It will draw your attention to unconscious processes at play in groups, your own patterns of relating and the many rational and emotional factors behind collective decision-making.

Nathalie McDermott, Jennifer Potter, Alana Avery
On Road Media

Changing the narrative: Collaborating with the media and people with lived experience

Type: Teach me
Theme: Relationships

On Road is a charity that connects journalists with people with lived experience of social issues to inspire new storylines in soaps, TV dramas, factual and comedy, as well as improving news coverage. We will share our knowledge on the kind of support that people with lived experience need to do this work safely and with agency, including practising self-care, building confidence through peer support, and learning strategic communication techniques when choosing which parts of a personal story to tell, when and why for maximum impact. We will discuss what journalists really want, and how they work, and share with you how we have developed long standing collaborative relationships with media professionals.

edendesigns

Peter Lefort & Catherine Wilkes
Eden Communities & Designs in Mind

Out of Line - Exercises in embracing the chaos

Type: Calm me
Theme: All

Play with inks, paper, charcoal, colour we attempt to take away the ability to control the outcome. Come and join us to experience the start of our creative process that opens up possibilities to create great work. In addition, your contribution here will make a difference as we bring it all together in a surprising and stunning collaboration.

Day 1, Lunch: 1.00pm - 1.45pm

Day 1, Session 2: 1.45pm to 3.15pm

Shevaun Haviland, James Ashall & Cecile Müller
Cabinet Office, Movement to Work, The Transition To Work Pilot

The Inclusive Economy Partnership: There's Power in Partnerships

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Collaboration

Description: The Inclusive Economy Partnership brings together businesses, civil society and government departments to work together to solve some of society’s toughest challenges, that policymakers in government have grappled with for decades. Through collaboration, innovation and a shared determination to make the UK a better place to live and thrive, the IEP is part of a growing global movement that’s trying to solve age-old problems with new ways of thinking. This session is about the approach of the IEP, why we chose to collaborate across sectors and what we have learned from doing so. We will also be providing a deep insight into one of our ongoing projects in the West Midlands to help young people find meaningful employment

Joanne Gibson, Brendan Odonovan & Emma Ashton
Vanguard Consulting

Relationships: beyond command and control

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Relationships

Description: We believe that the nature of our relationships (i.e. type and frequency) has the greatest impact on our ability to live a good life. The greatest leverage on any social system is to change the characteristics of relationships. In this session we will use exercises and real-life case studies to demonstrate this and the importance of being able to understand how the current system of ‘public service’ works and why. We will discuss what hinders our ability to create, develop and sustain relationships as well as what is working and why. Understanding and gathering knowledge about the why is essential if radical, sustainable and effective change is to happen.

Wisdom from the street: everything you thought you knew about tackling homelessness is wrong

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Relationships

In 2011, the Mayday Trust decided to do something new. They listened to people’s experiences and feelings about homelessness services and as a result Mayday have transformed every aspect of its work and mission from a traditional supported housing charity, to a national influencer for systemic change for people going through tough times. 

The Personal Transition Services (PTS) is a radically new approach that is spreading across the UK – tackling homelessness and other tough times, such as leaving care, coming off drugs or alcohol, coming out of prison or psychiatric hospital.  So what is PTS and how does it work? How did they do it? More importantly, how can you?

Power to the Punters

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Power

Description: How do organisations bypass governance and give real decision-making power to users/customers? How do you make membership a real and vital thing that gives you real influence on sexy things that might excite you, as opposed to theoretical power over things that don’t? How can organisations – especially community businesses – give their members something better than a boring AGM to make it worth their while?

Collaborating in complexity: embracing the mess to do what's best for people, not what's comfortable

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Collaboration

Description: Over the past two years Collaborate and Toby Lowe (Newcastle Business School) have been working with hundreds of funders, commissioners and providers to explore new ways of working that are genuinely people-led. Changing relationships and shifting power dynamics are two essential features, and people working in this way are clear that it takes fundamental change in mindset and roles and responsibilities, rather than tweaks around the edges. But there are increasing numbers of examples that show it is possible. Come and find out how they did it, and how you might too!

edendesigns

Peter Lefort & Catherine Wilkes
Eden Communities & Designs in Mind

Looking After Ourselves

Type: Calm me
Theme: All

Whether we are undertaking activism, business or any other project, looking after ourselves often takes a backseat. But none of us are immune to burning out. Join this practical session to discuss the symptoms and risks of burnout, and use tips and tools to help build resilience into our daily (and busy!) lives.

APLE Collective

How can we take a network approach to shaping policy from a lived experience perspective?

Type: Help Me
Theme: Power

TBC

Guy Pattison
Stronger Stories

Whose Story is it Anyway?

Type: Teach me
Theme: Relationships

We’re hardwired to use stories to make sense of the world, share ideas and find new ways to work together. But today, storytelling power is held by the 1% and overwhelmingly used to promote ideas that are bad for us. Join Stronger Stories – a movement of storytellers excited about the abundance of good ideas that can have a positive impact on the world – to learn a new and free way to get your good idea the attention it deserves. 

Day 1, Break: 3.15pm - 3.30pm

Day 1, Session 3: 3.30pm to 5.00pm

Ian Borges
SEMCO Style Institute

Organising wisely around humans instead of smartly around structures and procedures.

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Power

Semco Partners is a large Brazilian company best known for scaled, rapid growth attributed to its radical form of industrial democracy – an arrangement which involves workers making decisions and having the final, decisive say over all the big decisions including organisational design and hierarchy. The Semco Style Institute was created to share its learning and philosophy to others. This is the place to learn some of the practicalities of the Semco Style and about how you might organise wisely around humans instead of smartly around structures and procedures.

Norman Pickavance & Dr Scarlett Brown
Tomorrow’s Company

Purpose beyond profit: how can businesses better contribute to social change?

Type: Help me
Theme: Collaboration

Tomorrow’s Company is an independent, non-profit think tank that enables business to be a force for good in society. We believe that solutions to the biggest issues of our times require that everyone – business, society, and government, come together and gather at what we call “the intersection”. Business has a pivotal role to play but we are still grappling with the question of what is the contribution of business in societal progress?

We have identified big real issues that are holding society back that we need to find solutions for. For example, the problem of in work poverty is growing not reducing. Come along to this session to help us come up with an alternative model for the business sector in co-designing an approach that is inclusive of all quarters of society in addressing some of the biggest challenges of today’s world.

Luke Walter
Small Axe

Starting the conversation: creating an agile comms plan

Type: Teach me
Theme: Collaboration

Description: Documentation is where strategy goes to die and the days of the comms grid are no more. In 2019, to communicate our mission effectively, we have to move quickly, easily and take others with us.

Saul Gallick & Sam Kammerling
Holy Cross Centre Trust

Creating Genuine Community Ownership in Health and Social Care

Type: Help me
Theme: Power

Description: Holy Cross Centre Trust is a small, secular, dynamic organisation based in Camden, London. We work with people experiencing social exclusion, isolation and marginalisation, and our approach is shaped by the belief that seeing people as more than their problem or label is fundamental to any meaningful change. We place mutual learning at the heart of our approach, which helps us become aware and mindful of the power dynamics that run through our work. But this isn’t enough. The next meaningful step is giving greater ownership and influence to our staff, clients and community volunteers. We want to explore what community co-ownership might mean for a social care organisation and what this could look like in practice. We want to be challenged to think big, and to wrestle with some of the tensions and challenges this will throw up.

Jon Atherton & Jess Thomas
Co-operatives UK

From Rochdale, to Rwanda, to ... redundant?

Type: Help me
Theme: Power

175 years ago we forged a community lead movement based on values of self-help, equality, honest and solidarity. It spread all over the globe touching the lives of billions. But something has gone wrong in the Birthplace of the co-operative movement. We are still starting co-ops in diverse sectors from community shops to creative industries but few of these are in the very communities that gave birth to us, to meet their needs. This session will be scary… for us… We want to share with you what we do, crucially, we want you to critique us, challenge us and ultimately change us so we can reconnect to the working class communities like Rochdale where we belong.

Kevin Hefferman, Sameer Iqbal, Jay Arnold & Paula Harriott
NHS England, B’ham/Solihull Mental Health Foundation, Prison Liaison service & Prison Reform Service

Why employment of those with lived experience is the only way to really shift power: and how we did it

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Power

Kevin Heffernan
North Midlands Health & Justice Team, NHS England

Sameer Iqbal
Prison Liaison Service

Jay Arnold
Birmingham & Solihull Mental Health, NHS Foundation

Coproduction can easily become consultation and never truly challenge the power dynamic. It may even reinforce it by ticking the box of ’service user involvement’. In the North Midlands NHS England Health and Justice Team they weren’t prepared to let that happen. So, they started employing ex-prisoners and progressing them up the ranks not because of their professional skills but because of the value of their lived experience, with exciting results. It goes without saying it wasn’t easy, not least because it truly challenged the established culture, structure and set of processes. What were these challenges and how did they overcome them? What were the results? What can you learn and apply from their experience?

Betsy Dillner

Understanding Power Relationships in Campaigning: An Introduction to Power Mapping

Type: Teach me
Theme: Power

Power mapping is a tool that visualises how power is exercised in relation to its context and other power players. In order to run effective campaigns and organisations, we must be always aware of our relationship to power and how it is operating. This session will introduce you to the power mapping tool to work out current power relationships and then we develop strategies on how to shift those relationships to increase your power, and ultimately how to shift power relationships to sustain the change you are working to achieve. These allow your organisation to make more strategic campaign plans, create a shared framework of understanding power, and connect short term campaign strategies to long term goals.

edendesigns

Peter Lefort & Catherine Wilkes
Eden Communities & Designs in Mind

Communities of Learning

Type: Calm me
Theme: All

Reflection is a key part of learning and taking action, but reflective practice is hard to make time for. Join this space to discuss why reflection is important, different forms of learning relationships and how to find and be a mentor within your communities. Help to build our River of Reflection which will grow over the two days.

Day 1, Closing plenary: 5.00pm to 5.30pm

Day 1, Evening drinks: 6.00pm 9.00pm

Day 2, Arrival, breakfast, welcome and opening plenary: 8.30am - 9.30am

Day 2, Session 1: 9.30am to 11.00am

How you can help nurse-led holistic care and self-managed teams revolutionise health and social care in the UK

Type: Help me
Theme: Relationships

Description: Buurtzorg is a pioneering healthcare organisation established 10 years ago with a nurse-led model of holistic care and self-managed teams that has revolutionised community care in the Netherlands. Although our health and care systems are different, the challenges in the UK and Ireland are remarkably similar: ever-increasing demand, spiralling costs, fragmented care models, inadequate outcomes, disillusioned staff. Can you help Buurtzog adapt and establish this remarkable model in UK and Ireland?

Alan Budge
PB Partners

Participatory Budgeting: Sharing Power for Real

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Power

Description: With over 3,000 experiences recorded to date, Participatory Budgeting (PB) is a worldwide phenomenon for democratic decision making that has been evolving for over 30 years, and it is now rapidly expanding in Europe and North America, as well as the UK. PB can range from a means to engage new people and make funding reach further when allocating grants into communities, to multi-million-pound commissioning process for strategic mainstream budget setting. PB offers public bodies, fund holders and citizens a practical way to connect, deliberate and decide how resources are spent in a fair and transparent manner. Building on PB Partners long experience of supporting PB process across the UK, within this engaging workshop you will explore the what, why and how of PB, and its relevance to ‘losing control’.

Mission before preservation: taking a chainsaw to traditional models of governance to unleash a movement

Type: Help me
Theme: Power

Camerados is a movement of people that believe the answer to our problems is each other. It started with a simple but powerful idea: that friendships (however loosely defined) and a sense of purpose could help us all beat tough times; that isolation and loneliness underlie the big hairy problems in society (poor mental and physical health, addiction, homelessness, community tension).  The Association of Camerados is the tiny team powering the global movement.  They are exploring a radical new approach to accountability, one that is designed to put mission before preservation, that challenges the traditional power dynamic of the organisation over the people it serves, that is led by core principles not in opposition to them.  They’re on this journey already, they want to tell you all about it and then they need your help, challenge and ideas to take it further.

Philipa Bragman & Catherine Carter
Change People

Power and Inclusion - Can Power and Inclusion Work Together?

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Power

Description: This is an embodied experiential workshop using Deep Democracy and Theatre of the Oppressed techniques, co-facilitated by Catherine Carter and Philipa Bragman from CHANGE, a leading national human rights organisation that works nationally and internationally for the human rights of all people with learning disabilities. Starting with ourselves we will do a deep dive exploring our own experiences around having and not having power and feeling included and excluded. We will use forum theatre to share our stories identify barriers to inclusion and look at shared solutions. We hope the workshop will be engaging informative and fun! Together we hope we can make change happen and work out ways we can share power by including the most excluded communities.

Shae Eccleston and Marie-Claude

Marie-Claude Gervais
Versiti

Shae Eccleston

Powering seldom-heard groups to tackle inequalities

Type: Teach me
Theme: Collaboration

Description: This session shows how digital communities can be used to engage seldom-heard people to 1) identify their experiences and unmet needs, and 2) provide a structured tool for collaboration and co-creation. It draws on a case study with LGBT, ethnic minority and older cancer patients.

edendesigns

Peter Lefort & Catherine Wilkes
Eden Communities & Designs in Mind

Out of Line - Exercises in embracing the chaos

Type: Calm me
Theme: All

Play with inks, paper, charcoal, colour we attempt to take away the ability to control the outcome. Come and join us to experience the start of our creative process that opens up possibilities to create great work. In addition, your contribution here will make a difference as we bring it all together in a surprising and stunning collaboration.

Day 2, Break: 11.00am - 11.15am

Day 2, Session 2: 11.15am to 12.45pm

Sophie McKechnie & Catherine Russell
NESTA

Losing Control in 100 days: Can Action and Experimentation Redefine the Rules In Complex Systems?

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Collaboration

Come along to hear the lessons Nesta’s Health Lab have learnt about collaboration and sharing power through running 100 Day Challenges over the last five years. We’ll bring to life the conditions we’ve seen support change to happen differently and at pace, and explore the challenges and opportunities that ‘losing control’ brings, even when things don’t go to plan…

Miriam Steiner & Ceri Smith
SCOPE

Scope for Change

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Power

Description: We’ll share insights from Scope’s radical transformation from service provider to social change organisation and reflect on how we have shifted power to disabled people along the way, with lots of examples. And we’ll showcase Scope for Change, a programme where we hand over the reins to young campaigners to run their own campaigns on the issues that matter to them.

How do you lose control to young people in governance?

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Power

Description: Reducing the barriers to inclusivity and diversity in governance is not rocket science. Join us to explore the practical steps you or your organisation could take to include younger generations in decision-making. Of course, age is just one characteristic of diversity and we welcome too broader discussions around diversity in governance. We’d love to hear from those who agree that action is needed to include younger and more diverse voices in decision making and want to do something about it. Come and challenge your perspective on who should and can meaningfully be involved in decision making as well as to challenge ours.

At this session, you will take home a practical job description designed for including young or underrepresented people in governance, a developmental plan and business case to implement this in your organisation.

edendesigns

Peter Lefort & Catherine Wilkes
Designs in Mind & Eden Communities

Looking After Ourselves

Type: Calm me
Theme: All

Whether we are undertaking activism, business or any other project, looking after ourselves often takes a backseat. But none of us are immune to burning out. Join this practical session to discuss the symptoms and risks of burnout, and use tips and tools to help build resilience into our daily (and busy!) lives.

Betsy Dillner

How To Build A Movement: A Practical Guide To Changing The World

Type: Teach me
Theme: Collaboration

This practical session is for organisations and individuals who want to plan how to spark, support or sustain a social movement. It will help you think about who to involve and how, and you’ll leave with your own personalised Movement Building Canvas to use with your team, organisation, or coalition.
The Social Change Agency have helped organisations of all shapes and sizes to mobilize their networks behind a common cause and we developed the Movement Building Canvas because we wanted to share what we’ve learned about what works with the world.

Barnwood Trust

Trying to lose control and stay true to values: relationship building for social change in Gloucestershire

Type: Help Me
Theme: Relationships

Description: Building relationships between funders, public sector agencies and people with lived experience of disability and mental health challenges to effect change – How do you do it? What are the conditions for creative collaborations to emerge? What is the personal impact, and effect on organisations involved? What are the challenges to values that arise? Join us as we share what has happened on our patch, explore our learning so far and challenge us to continue losing control…
Picture: use the Barnwood Trust logo already on file

Day 2, Lunch: 12.45pm - 1.30pm

Day 2, Session 3: 1.30pm - 3.00pm

Relationship building comes before community building: what it has taken for communities to lead the housing revolution we need in Birmingham

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Relationships

Sophie Hall, Birmingham Social Housing Partnership – https://www.birminghamshp.co.uk
Karen Cheney, Birmingham City Council – https://www.birmingham.gov.uk
Andy Reeve, Impact Hub Birmingham – https://birmingham.impacthub.net

Description: Birmingham Community Homes is the result of an extraordinary collaboration of a large number of organisations and individuals across the city, who are now on the start of a journey to see 5% of homes built in the city by 2031 being community-led and controlled. Getting there hasn’t always been easy. What has it taken to build the relationships to trust needed to create this vision and platform? What will it continue to need to reach the ambitious goals they’ve set?

Jo and Anni

Jo Wolfe

Anni Rowland-Campbell 

Intersticia

Leading digital change with curiosity, courage and creativity

Type: Teach me
Theme: Relationships

Description: The digital age requires a new kind of leadership — you will navigate many tough questions, without having all the answers. How can you effectively lead digital change while devolving authority to those with lived experience? How can you transform your organisation and take everyone on the journey? How can you make radical shifts that are also sustainable in the long term? This session is for current and emerging leaders at all levels who want to bring about digital transformation.

Hasan Martin Di Maggio & Moosa Lawati
London Queer Muslims

Queer Religious Anarchism - How Queer Muslims take back power from religious authorities Description

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Power

In this session we will talk about how a group of Queer Muslims have taken back power from dominant hegemonic religious voices and empowered themselves to claim authority over their own spirituality. We will talk about the concept of queering religious text and tradition and how our own practices of power sharing deconstruct normalised religious authority structures. Talk to us about how this might apply to your own work.

claudia-laura

Claudia Knowles
Breast Cancer Care
Laura Ashurst

Support through storytelling

Type: Teach me
Theme: Relationships

Description: This session will give you practical tips on how to engage your audience, create a holistic user experience, and empower your users. We’ll learn from Breast Cancer Care’s mission to embed personal stories in their work and hear from someone living with secondary breast cancer who has found support through storytelling.

Hackathons for Civic Good

Type: Talk to me
Theme: Collaboration

Description: Our session is for those wishing or planning a hackathon for their organisation, calling, or cause. It’s broken into two parts: First we’ll talk about the basics, common pitfalls and powerful lessons we’ve learned as we set about organising our own community hackathons. Second, we’ll form groups around hackathon organising needs and stumbling blocks of our audience (or present scenarios for those just here to learn), and then facilitate each group to workshop their ideas.

supporter logos

Sally Byng, Joe Doran, Fergus Arkley & Sarah Campbell
Barnwood Trust, Lankelly Chase Foundation, Power to Change Trust  & Joseph Rowntree Foundation

Funding networks, movements and community leadership not people, organisations and projects

Type: Help me
Theme: Power

Long-term, sustainable social change requires more than just a single organisation or project to bring it about. Often it entails creating and sharing a vision of the future so strong, that it compels people to action, a wide spread change in narrative or attitude, a creation of a common identity and values across people with lived experience of an issue, a coalition of organisations and people working towards common goals, and an investment in the leaders of tomorrow that will embody the change and embed it into the next generation.

Funding that kind of approach is tricky. What does this mean for Foundations? What are they trying? What are the pain points, the highs and the lows around intention and back office management? Join this session to share your insights and debate what funders might need to let go of in order to build sustainable investment in networks, movements, leaders and communities Come and share your insights to support them and other funders to help them do this better.

edendesigns

Peter Lefort & Catherine Wilkes
Eden Communities & Designs in Mind

Communities of Learning

Type: Calm me
Theme: All

Reflection is a key part of learning and taking action, but reflective practice is hard to make time for. Join this space to discuss why reflection is important, different forms of learning relationships and how to find and be a mentor within your communities. Help to build our River of Reflection which will grow over the two days.

Day 2, Closing plenary: 3.300pm to 3.45pm

The Eden Room - drop in anytime on either day

edendesigns

The Eden Room

Hosted and curated by Eden Project Communities and Designs in Mind, both experts at creating spaces for ideas to flourish.

All are welcome to our space to connect, open throughout the event for drop-in activities and discussions which will invite you to reflect, think, play and connect with yourself and others.

Whether you need space to breathe, gather your thoughts or nourish your mind this space offers open discussion, art, movement, reflection and is yours to connect and use throughout the two days.

Out of Line

Exercises in embracing the chaos Play with inks, paper, charcoal, colour we attempt to take away the ability to control the outcome. Come and join us to experience the start of our creative process that opens up possibilities to create great work. In addition, your contribution here will make a difference as we bring it all together in a surprising and stunning collaboration.

The River of Reflection

Come and contribute your thoughts, ideas and hopes to our river as it grows across the walls throughout the event. Share your reflections on the conversations you have had, and sessions you have attended, and see how the experiences of others mirrors and differs from your own.

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